Archive for February, 2005

Indescribable

Tuesday, February 22nd, 2005
Mature, wise, experienced, and wise these are the things that firstly and mostly attracted me to her. I’ve never met someone with such a determination and with such a rare and noble goal (in this part of the world) as writing a book before. She is perfect from her smile to the way she runs her hand through her hair. Her eyes reveal nothing about her history adding mysteriousness to her. Even the way she walks signifies that she is proud and full of confidence. The way she constantly plays with her black sunglasses removing it and putting it back in her hair is so womanlike. She is the ideal woman, full of ideas and morals with a beauty that you would only find in a dream. What scares me the most is the very idea that she may not or ever will feel the same way I do about her due to my age and looks. I am scared of knowing that after doing the seemingly impossible task of opening my heart to another will still not change my fate of walking this earth alone forever.

She speaks of tales someone like me will never go through further strengthening my belief that I will never obtain her love. My first love is actually related to her, it’s as if Ill never be rid of her influences. I still love her of course but she has hurt my heart far too many times for so long to the point that I never thought I would find someone else. From what I’ve noticed of myself is that I tend to have infatuations far too easily, sometimes prior to even talking or getting to know the person. It pains me to see that I’ve repeated mistakes I thought I overcame but with her I genuinely believe that I am truly falling in love with her. I’ve talked to her, and gotten to know her and there are some things about her which simply cannot be put into words. It hurts me to a point beyond anything I’ve endured before, perhaps even more than what I had endured with my first love.

She at the time was my idea of perfect, it’s quite surprising to see and finally be able to admit that now she isn’t or ever could have been my ideal utopian love. My generation consists of people not compatible with my every desire which is something I’ve learned to deal with. The very idea that I have found someone who is my ideal love yet feel as if I can never be with her is indeed a pain and a burden that I sincerely believe no one has had to deal with. They all mention of their pathetic boyfriend girl friend issues with the assumption that I knew what they were dealing with. I do not believe in that sort of materialistic and temporary relationship, I believe in deeper more meaningful relationships. A relationship where the parts would know of my intentions and give me their blessings is indeed the best kind of relationship as it would be in harmony with the noble teachings of Islam. It has saddened me to have gone through life thinking that I was the only person to so passionately believe in this but I am certain ‘She’ feels the same way as well. Words simply cannot explain all that I feel for her, what I have written so far is only a percentage of what I truly feel for her. My sole wish in life is to be with her yet deep down I believe I will relive my curse of the… ‘Lone Wolf’.



Monday, February 21st, 2005
Upon Falling in Love With an Arabian Queen

~ A Thousand Nights ~

~ And then it was said that he cried for a thousand nights until he became blind as the thought of her not existing in this world was too much for him to bear ~

~ Every day gone passed without you by my side, is a night spent weeping until the next morning ~

~ This life as short as it may be, without you seems like an eternity of misery and suffering ~

~ Through a crowd of people, all that can be seen by my ever blind eyes, is your presence, ever so beautiful and tranquil ~

~ You are by all that seems right in this world, a beauty words cannot describe ~

~ Through times of despair and sorrow, the only thought possible is that of your well being and no one else’s ~

~ Let it be known that my eyes only knowingly gaze upon you with a passion so fueled by my ever dying desire to be with you and only you until we grow old together ~

~ Despite life’s many obstacles that I have been burdened with, I only wish for your happiness, even though it can never be with me ~

~ Regardless of our brief past together, I can’t help but wonder how complete my life would be if we were destined to be with one another for all eternity ~

~ With his last dying moments, he summoned enough strength and courage to utter her name until (as) his lips went silent ~

~ Upon being granted with three wishes by a powerful and wicked genie, the man used his first wish for her eyes to remain ever so vibrant of life. As for his second wish, the man urged the genie to make her spirit maintain her independence and character. Finally, for the man’s third wish, he asked the genie to grant her a life of happiness. Never before had a genie of such power and evil, bow before a man, weeping and begging the man to stop and to think of himself for once. The man smiled as the genie continued weeping for the man confirmed his three wishes ~

~ Upon falling in love with a mortal woman, they spent countless moments together full of happiness. But alas, her time had come as she being human grew old. She pleaded for him to stop thinking about her and to move on as he still retained his vigor and youth. Out of his rage, he cursed his immortality, and sought out the spring that would rob him of his immortality and would make him age as a normal mortal would. Drinking more than necessary, he quickly became of the same age as his beloved so that he could spend his last few remaining breaths with her as they died side by side, with their hands clasped together ~

~ Every time he had imagined not knowing her, he would punish himself by plowing the farms until his hands and feet became sore. Finally the man lay down his sickle, and lay to rest, only to never awaken again ~

~ Every waking moment of his life since his childhood, his pillow was soaked with tears as he had seen a woman in his dreams. A dream with a mysterious woman of indescribable beauty that had filled his heart with such joy. Yet tragically that same dream, would become a nightmare as the woman always ends up falling in love with another man ~

~ One day his beloved lay in bed plagued with a sickness with no cure but a new heart. The man without a single note of fear or regret gave out his heart despite realizing that this would be his final hour in this world with his dearly loved. It is said that as they laid his body to rest, a single tear could be seen coming from his right eye and his left eye as the woman upon being cured fell in love with man, quickly forgetting her husband’s sacrifice. Some say that the tear from the left eye reached up till the man’s nose, as they say was the resentment he shared for his wife as she had betrayed him. Several say that the tear from his right eye reached his chin as this was how much he loved her, despite her unfaithfulness. ~

~ Never before had a man of such wealth gained by a lifetime of blood and sweat, sacrifice all of his fortune in remembrance of his passed loved one, to building a monument in her name, to the extent that he could no longer afford a loaf of bread ~

~ Indeed he would die for her in any manner or moment, yet to become close with her seemed like a feat that even the mightiest and bravest of men could not accomplish ~


Gimagua Twins and All that Jazz

Thursday, February 17th, 2005
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The Gimagua Brothers, Music from Union Square. 3 clips

Thursday, February 17th, 2005

Allofmp3 allofmp3.com